If I can do it, so can you!
- Richard
- Oct 3
- 3 min read
Are you truly living the way you want? Or are you mainly doing what's expected of you? Sometimes it feels like life is passing you by, while deep down you know you'd like to make different choices. But how do you take that step? How do you dare to truly listen to yourself and go for what you value? This blog shares my journey.
Looking back, I realize I never would have dared to take the step to truly live the way I do now. Yet, I do. A large part of that change came from personal development and coaching. These sessions taught me to look at myself, my fears, my beliefs, and my core values. More importantly: what norms and behaviors are associated with these? Do I truly live according to these core values? And how do I translate that into my daily life?
My outdoor coach training in 2023
Discovering outside yourself
I took an Outdoor Coach course, where I literally went outside myself, similar to the intensive programs you know from, for example, Kamp van Koningsbruggen or Special Forces VIPS . Sleeping in a tent in the Swedish forests at minus 10 degrees Celsius. Learning to survive in the cold while simultaneously developing self-awareness. It became crystal clear there: all fears, limitations, and beliefs are only in our heads.
Limiting beliefs and fears
Limiting beliefs and fears are often your biggest obstacles. Thoughts and opinions based on past experiences. You once found a way to cope, a strategy that worked at the time. Yet, that way is so ingrained that you can hardly shake it. With every event, in the here and now, such an unconscious strategy is automatically activated.
“Freedom begins when you dare to live according to your own core values, instead of the stories you tell yourself.”
Rewriting your old story
During the Outdoor Coach training, we focused heavily on what they called " your old story ." Can you see the things you've experienced differently? Can you write a new story that helps you move forward? To do this, we looked at five key areas:
Attachment & Meaning – What is your attachment style ? How is your interaction with others ?
Identity & Effectiveness – What are your core needs ? What is your adapted self?
Talent vs. Limitation – What are your talents and how do you compensate for your weaknesses?
Body and mind are one – how does your physical and mental state influence your behavior and beliefs?
Process capabilities – Vulnerability-stress model
Photos of the Wilderness Route in Sweden
Freedom starts with you
By exploring these areas, I realized that freedom doesn't start with circumstances but with the way you see yourself and the stories you believe.
Meeting yourself
It wasn't, and isn't, always easy. Breaking old patterns is painful. It takes courage to face yourself, to examine the (limiting) beliefs you've kept hidden for years. But the reward is immense: clarity about who you are, what you value, and the confidence that you can make choices that truly suit you.
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The process step by step
So my process actually began with clarifying my core values. What norms and behaviors correspond to them? Next, I defined my biggest dream for this life. After that, I examined which limiting beliefs were preventing me from doing it yet. These were mostly beliefs from the old story I told myself. Then I wrote a new story that better reflects who I am now and who I truly want to be. The freedom that resulted isn't dependent on circumstances, but on me.
If I can go through that process, so can you. What story are you telling yourself? And do you dare to rewrite that story?
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